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When Oceans Keep Love Apart

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by Lina Martinez

Our capacity for love is enormous. Love comes in many shapes and forms, but when you feel it, you know you have it. You might have love for a partner or spouse. Perhaps your heart is filled with joy for your children? Even our pets can spark a deep bond and set of emotions. The time we most yearn for the people in our lives is when we know we can’t reach out to them for that all-important hug.

Technology Isn’t Enough

Living on different continents with oceans and politics separating you from each other is really tough to take. There are plenty of ways to stay in touch these days. The phone is fine. Video calls are better because you can see each other’s faces. But none of it comes close to feeling as good as being together in person. So what can you do when you’re not able to be together for months at a time?

Visas Aren’t Enough

Visas are sometimes so restrictive that you wonder if you’ll ever get to spend any quality time together. You might both have permission to stay longer in other countries. But the cost of accommodation for this type of vacation might make it impractical. You would both need to take a lot of time off work too!

 

 

Travel documents must be in good order. Image credit

 

Marriage Isn’t Enough

Other ways to extend your visas in each other’s countries might include taking on particular types of work. What about undertaking further studies at a reputable university? This isn’t easy to set up, and will still have a time limit. Chances are you’ve considered a legal marriage as an option. Unfortunately, many places still refuse permanent residency. It’s worth speaking to someone with specialist legal advice about your status like the lawyers at the Hacking Law Practice. They might be able to give you some advice on your applications. Legal representatives can often highlight approaches you might not yet have considered.

So how did you meet?

Perhaps you met on vacation? Maybe you studied together for a while? Sometimes when you’re trying to get away from everything, you find your way to a new love. Or maybe a chance meeting at a conference on business brought you into each other’s lives? That first moment might have sparked something deep inside each of you then. But how on earth can you keep that flame of passion alive when you’re thousands of miles from each other?

Living Alone In Love

Both of you need to continue your independent lives without the distractions a lonely heart can cause. You each need to get up every morning and go to work. Perhaps you’re in different time zones and working different shift patterns? It can be difficult to set up a routine of daily contact, but it might ease the loneliness a little if you can. Of course, there is the problem of having nothing new to talk about. How do you keep conversations fresh and stimulating?

 

 

Missing each other? Image credit

 

One of the best ways to always have something to talk about is to share a hobby or interest. Perhaps you both enjoy playing musical instruments? Why not have a practice session or two together? Starting a project where you can both collaborate online can also give you plenty to do together even though you are thousands of miles apart. Maybe you have business interests that you can share? Sometimes a simple photo project where you each take a photo a day for a long-term collage mount is all you need. You can have hours of great conversation each week talking about the shots.

Saying Hello

At last, after weeks or months, you’ve arranged to spend some time together again. The paperwork has come through, and the visas are in place. Your respective employers have been very generous with the leave allocation. And you’re able to take that quality time that you’ve both been craving. So what will you do with all this time?

If you treat every visit as a vacation, the reality of a relationship never really surfaces. This might prove problematic later on if you ever apply for permanent residency and choose to live together. It might be better for both of you if you do your best to stick to your usual routines and activities. Remote working makes it possible for your partner to continue their job, while you’re in the office doing yours.

 

 

Happier together. Image credit

 

Save the special excursions and fancy dinners for the weekend, just as you would if you were a married couple living together full time. Of course, after so long apart, you might find the mundane things like cleaning and laundry to be a delight as you’re in each other’s arms. The exception to this might be if children are involved. If one parent has to live overseas for the majority of the time, then it is only fair they spend quality time making incredible memories for the whole family when they’re back.

Saying Goodbye

It’s really important that you don’t overstay your visa on any occasion. Even the slightest breach of the terms or regulations can mean you are no longer welcome to enter the country again. It will depend on the circumstances and other political or local issues going on. Still, it’s better just to plan to leave in plenty of time. Always check all your travel documents are together and in date.

Saying goodbye is never easy. Knowing you won’t be in each other’s arms again for months makes this departure all the more agonizing. Sometimes it’s easier not to say goodbye at the airport. Other times, you want every spare second together. Plan your journey ahead with plenty of time to get where you need to be. It can be very expensive to miss a flight!

As much as you’ll miss each other, you will soon be texting, messaging, and video calling again. Some people use a countdown app to help them keep track of the days left until you’re together again. Others mark off a calendar. Whatever you do, try not to dwell on it all for too long. Love knows no geographic boundaries!

 

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